Front Porches

I arrived home yesterday afternoon to a complaining husband [as if Short's complaining is news to anyone....especially me]. His complaint was that we HAD to get a new mattress and it had to be right then. [Now, correct me if I'm wrong but does one just all of a sudden HAVE to have a new mattress? I mean, if your mattress spontaneously combusts then yes, there would be a need for a new mattress. But an aching back does not require a new mattress...does it?] I knew that his back had been hurting for a while but yesterday was apparently the straw that broke the camel's back [Or the mattress that broke Craig's back] and so we were off to shop for a new mattress.

Shopping for a mattress is an interesting experience. It's not like shopping for other furniture: a chair or a sofa you can simply sit on, a kitchen table you can sit at but a mattress requires a little more work. You have to lay down on the it [and with other people watching, that is just weird] and make sure you like it. And with Craig that was even more weird because he said, "You can't just lay back on it so lay like you do when you are sleeping." [First of all, I'm in a room full of strange people so laying on this mattress is going to be nothing like it is when I am sleeping...unless I sleep in a room full of strange people!!!!!] So he made me turn on my side and lay there a minute. Then entire time I am thinking, "How many people before me, that actually laid down on this exact bed, actually bathed before shopping for a new mattress? Or even bathed in the last two days? Or two weeks? I am so going to get the cooties while shopping for a mattress."

Fast forward to last night, when we arrived home with the new mattress. We had to move the old mattress out to put the new one in [and some of you are now thinking, "Thank you Captain Obvious"] and of course, like any good redneck, we moved the old one to our front porch. No, no - no time to put in on the back of the truck last night - we just left it on the front porch. We finally decided to take it to the dump at around 12:30pm today.

So that made me think about riding by houses and seeing all kinds of crap sitting on other folks front porches. What possess a person to just say, "Hell, we need a new fridge so we'll just put the old one on the front porch and leave it." [Maybe I'm the only one that thinks about these things.] If something breaks or needs fixin' then surely there are other places to put things besides the front porch. [I'm not trying to be judgemental or condescending or any of those other fancy things....well, maybe I am trying for a little sarcasm here....] I mean we could've left our mattress sitting there for three or four days [or weeks...or years] but why would we? Just seems like a little bit of laziness to not just haul away your old furniture or appliances [or trash]. I don't live in a fancy smancy house in an ultra swanky neighborhood and leaving the old mattress on the porch for over 12 hours was slightly embarassing [and a lot redneck].

For the record, Short's back didn't hurt quite as bad this am...thank goodness. And if you rode by my house and saw a mattress on the front porch rest assured we did finally move it. Wishing all of you an awesome [and a clutter free front porch] for 2011.

Twenty Eleven Peeps

So I've been thinking about my "goals" for 2011. I put those in quotes because they are not really goals as much as they are things that I either need to do or want to do [or is it need to want to do or want to need to do?] Actually, there are some things that I have wanted to do for a very long time but I didn't do them yet. I've really been thinking about how old I am getting - I guess it is the fact that Molly will be 15 on Thursday that's making me feel old [That and the grey hair that just refuses to stay colored no matter how very hard I try]. Of course, I'm not that old...I do have a 4 year old too. [That could account for the grey hair problem].

I choose not to call this a bucket list [I'm not ready to kick the bucket just yet]. Just a list of short term and long term goals for me. I am thinking that maybe a little bit of organization in my life would help out [plus I'll stop showing up late for appointments or on the wrong day altogether. I do realize there are calendars out there for that sort of thing but you have to buy one for them to work. I've begged for a secretary and Craig keeps saying no....]

1. Read the Bible all the way through, from beginning to end. [I read it and have read most of it but not straight through.]
2. Start a women's bible study. [Actually working on one right now and it will start in January. It is called Made to Crave and we'll be learning how to turn to God instead of food. Hit me up here or via email if you want to join.]
3. Do another triathlon. [My mom has already signed Summer and I up for the Ramblin' Rose in Charlotte. Summer, Molly, and I want to do one in Atlanta in May. I've got to start swimming again - Uuugghhhh!!!]
4. Read the Harry Potter series. I saw the latest movie and it has intrigued me to learn the why and the how.
5. Lose weight...as in big time lose weight. As in, get back to high school [or at least pre-babies weight] weight and stop being the "big girl".
6. Start hiking [Ambitious for me but Cooper keeps asking me so we'll start.]
7. Volunteer somewhere and give of my time.
8. Learn yoga [I know there are classes at the Y but I'm chicken to join b/c I'm not limber, coordinated, or rhythmic at all.]
9. Take a photography class. [I have at least 2000 pictures on my computer and I bet that 1900 of them are blurry, or the flash is too bright or not bright enough, or something.]

I look forward to the new year but I can't complain about 2010. God has been so good to us and blessed us in so many ways this past year. I have so many aspirations for my family and for our future. My prayer for each of you is that your goals and dreams do come true this new year

"Live with intention. Walk to the edge. Practice wellness. Listen hard. Play with abandon. Laugh. Choose with no regret. Appreciate your friends. Continue to learn. Do what you love. Live as if this is all there is."

Nothing Better ♥

I am convinced that there is nothing better than being a part of this family. This family being those of us here at Fulton Drive, the Byrums, the Shorts, and the friends that I call family. God has truly, truly blessed us in ways I could have never, ever imagined. What better way to spend Jesus' birthday than with family...Gabe's been Spiderman all day long, Emma has baked cupcakes with her new baking set, Cooper's worn all of his clothes and jerseys, and Molly used her DQ Blizzard Maker to compliment dessert. Nana, Paw Paw, and Mimi came over for a fabulous Christmas dinner. And I am married to the most amazing man in the world :) What more could a girl ask for?

From my family to yours I hope you've had a Very Merry Christmas.

Missy ♥

Twas the Night Before Christmas

Ever want to just write something really absurd? [Some of you are saying all of my writing is absurd...] I heard Twas the Night Before Christmas on TV and it made me want to write my own version...enjoy.

Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house

Not a creature was stirring, except maybe a mouse

[I don't like to vacuum and Gabe makes a mess

So the mouse is attracted to the crumbs under the bar is my guess]

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care

And the littlest Shorties got Christmas cuts on their hair.

Molly, Cooper and Emma were nestled, all snug in their beds

But Gabe likes to sleep wherever he lays his head.

And Craig with his breathing machine and me in my zebra pants

Had just settled to bed when we heard quite a rant.

When from the kitchen their arose such a clatter

And I waited to hear the sound of glass shatter.

Craig jumped from his slumber and tore off his mask

[And if you've seen that thing that's no easy task]

Upon entering the kitchen we saw Santa himself

And peering from behind a tiny little elf.

[Now I was amazed to see the jolly old man

And then I wondered what I drank in that Sundrop can]

"You are not real....Santa is a fake."

"Well you see me don't you?" he said as he ate some cake.

I rubbed my eyes and shut them tight.

Should I be alarmed at this crazy sight?

Santa began to pull large toys from his sack

And then Craig took a huge step back.

I happened to see that Santa's little elf

Could have easily stood on top of a shelf.

Now if you know Craig then you know his greatest fear,

He is extremely afraid when midgets are near.

"Santa I believe that you are real and true.

But that midget's got to go - I thought you knew."

Santa peered from inside the big red sack,

[And Santa really needs a belt - we saw his crack]

"Now Craig, he is simply one of my tiny friends from the shop"

"I know" said Craig, "But his tiny fingers and big head I want to chop."

So Santa bid his elf to sit in his sleigh

And Craig was thankful that he got his way.

Now back to Santa's sack full of goodies.

"I'm not sure have some for you...wait! Here are some new hoodies!"

"There are shoes, clothes, and presents galore.

And I am pretty sure that isn't it...there is more."

Craig and I were amazed - this absolutely could not be real

Then we heard Santa say loud and clear, "Here is your bill!"

"I expect payment in full by December 26th

Otherwise next year there will be nothing but sticks!"

And with a loud sinister laugh Santa jumped out of sight

Craig and I examined the bill and pondered our plight...

"Mommy! Daddy! Wake up it's Christmas morning"

"Seriously Mommy, get up and stop all that snoring!"

I woke from my slumber to find Emma in my face

And Craig, sleeping soundly, on the bed in his space.

I thought about Santa...could it all have been a dream?

I was sure it was real but things are not always what they seem.

"Mommy let's go see if Santa came to our house last night!"

So I woke up Craig and he fumbled for the light.

We walked very slowly, all six of us to the living room

Craig looked at me and said I looked like gloom and doom.

I found the gifts from the encounter with the man in the red suit.

I even saw a print....left from a big, black boot!!!

I realized just then that Santa had been here.

[And the episode wasn't caused by drinking too much beer.]

However the detailed bill from Santa, given the night before

Was not to be found...it existed no more.

That part was a dream but the meeting with Santa was real.

And even the elf on the shelf had been the real deal.

I didn't dare tell Craig- he already thinks I'm crazy.

And I spent the rest of my day, with my kids, being lazy.

So enjoy your Christmas and the festivities of the season.

But always remember that Jesus is the reason.

[I hope that all of enjoy Christmas with family and friends...

Now my poem will come to an end.]

And I heard Santa say, as he drove out of sight

"Missy's bedhead is really a mess and it gave me a fright!"

Merry Christmas!! Life as a Short is good is wonderfully awesome this Christmas season :)

And born unto, this day, in the City of David, a Savior which is Christ the Lord. And this shall be a sign unto you: You should find the babe, wrapped in swaddling clothes and lying in a manger. And suddenly, there was with the angel, a multitude of heavenly host, praising God and saying:

"Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men. Luke 2:11-14

A Christmas Newsletter

Several years ago [Before Emma was born] I decided to write a newsletter from the Short family. It was just after my 10 year class reunion so I'm not sure if I was trying to further explain the last ten years of my life [As if ANYONE but me cared] or if I wanted to try to impress the folks I saw at the reunion [Why was I worried about impressing these people I will never know....but that is for another, way more sarcastic blog]. Of course, Craig made fun of my newsletter and I never wrote another. Fast forward to last year and just before Christmas, when I got an idea to write another Christmas newsletter from the Short family. Of course sarcasm got the best of me and it ended up being a joke between Craig and me. This year I decided to try my hand at the whole newsletter thing again but I wanted to try it out on you first....

[DISCLAIMER: If you are 1. easily offended by sarcasm 2. a person who sends a Christmas newsletter 3. both 1 and 2 then maybe you want to now Google "Free MS Publisher Templates for Christmas Newletters"]

Dear Friends and Family,
What a fantastic year for the Shorts! Since last Christmas we have relocated - TWICE! Well, four times if you count the neverending storage bins full of junk that we managed to string out until about 3 weeks ago. Our first residence was in a quaint little apartment complex just on the other side of Shelby. While this put us closer to Kings Mountain, it also put our lives in danger. Aside from the grotesque mold growing in the back of our closet [which was about 3in deep but nearly 25ft in length] we are quite certain that the people above us vacuumed ALL of their carpet up while living above us, at all hours of the night. Our visit [notice there is no s on that word] to the apartment pool left us feeling that a shower was necessary and that we should enroll in the witness protection program. To say that Dueling Banjos was heard nightly is an understatement and I saw more Budweiser trucker hats than I care to remember. And, just as we moved out, a strange cat with this lady moved in next to us. Thank goodness we were able to get into our house....the banjos were getting closer and closer.

Molly started high school this year, Cooper is in his last year at the intermediate school, Emma is in first grade, and Gabe is still in daycare. [Yes, because paying daycare for 13 straight years is something that some of you only dream of doing]. The kids are well and keep us busier than ever. [Pretty sure here is where I should insert how wonderfully smart they are, how they are on their way to being Rhodes Scholars, and how we are doing the braces things on the oldest two.] We spend a lot of time laughing and spending time together. Of course, we were Craig's biggest fans during football season this year. [Unfortunately I had to have a word of prayer with more than one "fan" and a few people from across the creek via Facebook.] Cooper's team made it to the championship game. [And then picked the wrong day to play crappy] Molly switched softball teams [thank goodness is all I'll say about that one]. We stay pretty busy...but we love every minute of it! [Insert eye rolls and words like "PUH-LEASE" and "Yeah, right" at this point. I would LOVE one afternoon of laying on the couch and watching Oprah instead of taking a kid somewhere to play something.] I am glad they are involved in sports and Craig and I enjoy being the parents on the sidelines. [Of course we've had to put up with so much crap from "fans" that we actually know how to conduct ourselves at a sporting event without throwing the coaches and players under the bus...just sayin'.....] Emma is still the diva in our family. [In fact, last week I caught her dancing between the spindles (uh..hum poles) on the end of her bed...IN HER UNDERWEAR and tshirt]. Gabe is all about the frightening fours. The boy is going to be the death of me and he really doesn't care.

Work is well...work. Craig and I are still teaching. He moved to the Academy this year and he seems to be enjoying it - he is surrounded by a bunch of women :) And they are good to him. [I know that because otherwise I would hear about it.] He is looking forward to softball season this year and it will be much nicer that we live so close to the field. I have enjoyed my year with a new group of 8th graders. But you know, 8th graders really do some weirdo things....just trust me on that one.

We've been busy preparing for this Christmas season. We've managed to go broke trying to purchase Christmas for four kids. I mean I do not live with Scrooge. Now the man will chop off MY fingers as restitution for going over-budget but we let it all fly at Christmas.

So as you can see, we've had a fantastic year! We look forward to a wonderfully awesome and magical 2011!!

Love,

The Shorts

I mean really, when I go back and read it I don't even care about what I did this year so why would anyone else? I don't mean to step on your toes if you want to tell us how Little Johnny was elected his third grade class president and that you have joined the tennis club but honestly we don't care. I work hard to raise four kids, be a good wife, and a good mother [and I'm not sure how effective I am but I try] and there is just no way that life is as perfect as the little Christmas newsletter makes it out to be. Maybe I am way too sarcastic...maybe I am mean....or maybe..I. just don't care to hear. Just send me a Christmas card and we'll all be happy :)

Life as a Short [sans the newsletter] is good as always :)

Stop! Collaborate and Listen

So tonight I ventured to Wal-Mart [A. I love torture B. We really needed groceries C. All of the above] along with 4,289 other people from the big CC. I grabbed a cart and upon pushing it through the throngs of people I realized all were staring at me. [Yes, my beauty is head turning but I had it toned down a bit tonight. Why are you laughing?] They were staring because I managed to grab the LOUDEST cart in Wal-Mart. With every push the left back wheel skipped, causing the entire cart to rattle. As I was picking out Ibuprofen I am fairly certain the folks in the pharmacy were laughing at me. I grabbed the Old Spice deodorant and enormous bottle of Equate ibuprofen and headed for the door. [No...I was not going to shop lift.....I stopped doing that years ago...well, a year ago...] I grabbed another cart and this one, too, was loud enough to wake the dead [or at least get the attention of the self-check clerk] . I walked back and got a third cart, threw my loot in there and went upon my merry [and much quieter] way.


Cooper got a set of drums for his birthday. [No, we don't have a mean-spirited person who is trying to get back at us. The child has asked for them for his birthday or Christmas for the past four years so Paw Paw finally gave in and bought them.] He's actually not too bad for a complete rookie. It's funny to watch Gabe and Emma dance while he's playing. I am quite sure the honeymoon will wear off and I'll be ready to kill him for playing them but for now we are good. It was even funnier to see Craig playing them [Pretty fly for a white guy :)]


So we're driving down the road just over a week ago and BAM! out of nowhere this idiot hits us on the passenger's side. He ran a stop sign and plowed into the front of my car. He got out, shouted to us to see if everyone is OK then HE DROVE OFF. That's right...but his sorry, narrow behind back in his car and left me and two kids with our car standing in the middle of the road. [Not to mention he yelled something very ugly out the car door as he drove by. Bad enough he hit us but now he's cussing us out!] Surpisingly, I stayed fairly calm [Not going to lie, I can have a mouth like a sailor when I get that angry. I am not proud of that but it is the truth. I am working on it....] and I didn't get upset at the time. Now, the more I think about it the madder it makes me. [And don't think that I haven't driven ALL over KM looking for a wrecked, older model black Lexus because I'm going to find him. As my dad would say, "I'm going to get some satisfaction."]


Doing well at the Y and even talked Short into going with me. We go around 8 and work out from 8 - 9 [because no one is in there to see me!!!] . I like the treadmill and have actually done really well on it so far. I really enjoy going - thanks again to whomever thought enough about me to get me going...you are a wonderfully kind person!!


Our sermon at church today was about doing what you should do to draw closer to God and stop being an obstacle to all of the wonderful things God wants to do in your life. One thing Brother Chip touched on was to stop making excuses, then he made reference to make excuses for being late. [And if you know me then you realize that I have what is termed chronic lateness....as in early is not in my vocabulary...as in neither is on time...most of the time fashionably late also gets the boot. Ask my parents and my sister - they don't count me ever being somewhere when I say I'm going to be there.] Then Brother Chip made the statement that put it all in perspective: If you are late then you are incompetent and lack control over your life. WOW..as in, GET OFF MY TOES kind of statement. I know Craig was snickering to himself and Cooper wa staring holes through my head. Ok, so I've been late a few [million] times...I'm a busy person. But incompetent? Lack control over my life? But it is true and was sort of a wake up call. I can do better. I will do better. I will stop making excuses and blaming others. [I will wake up @ 6am instead of 6:30am.]



As always, life as a Short is LOUD and AWESOME!

The Griswolds Ain't Got Nuthin' on the Shorts

Some folks get sentimental about Christmas movies like Miracle on 34th Street [Never even seen it] and It's a Wonderful Life [I like Jimmy Stewart but I've never seen the whole movie.] My all time fave Christmas movie is Christmas Vacation. Really...EVERYONE has a Cousin Eddie in their family don't they? In fact, YOU may be the Cousin Eddie in your family. How can you not laugh when Clark comes out to find Eddie emptying the RV's bathroom in the storm drain, in his tiny bathrobe?
"And while you're at it Clark, buy yourself some thing real nice."

"If I woke up tomorrow with my head sewn to the carpet I wouldn't be any more surprised than I am now."
Gotta love Christmas Vacation....


Isn't it funny how families are so different? For instance, my family [talking the entire, extended family] - we are all so different. Nothing bad about that it's just that when we are all together the differences don't matter - we enjoy one anothers company and we enjoy being together. So like the Griswolds there are some quirky folks [Ask anyone in my family - I am probably one of them.] and there are some that are a little on the redneck [Cousin Eddie] side [again, probably one of the Shorties]. That is why I love Christmas and family...and we shouldn't wait to see them only once a year.


My kids love [duh...they are kids] Christmas. As in my last post, the Christmas lists at my house get longer and longer. And the annual Christmas card is almost ready. [My kids LOVE (hint of extreme sarcasm there) the annual Christmas picture.] Molly's eye rolling should be caught on camera :) Cooper cannot stand pictures. Of course Emma [the picture hound] loves pictures. And we cannot get Gabe still enough to snap a picture. But, when Mom wants a picture then Mom's going to get a picture - SMILE.....Merry Christmas!!


As always, life as a Shortie [er, Griswold] could not be better :)

Mommy I Have One More Thing to Add to My List

As most of you know, I have four awesome children. [I mean really, with a mom like me they can't help but be awesome now can they? I give zero credit to Craig.] Each year, as most parents do, we ask them to submit a list of things they would like for Christmas. Emma and Gabe love to get the huge Toy 'R Us add that comes around Halloween and look at it over and over and over again. Of course, Gabe wants everything, Emma wants all the girlie stuff - between the two of them they circled nearly everything in the book!!

This year, since Emma's in the first grade and loves writing, she wanted to write her own list. It took her about an hour...and once you see the list you will understand why:
1. iPad [If I ain't gettin' one she ain't neither...just sayin']
2. iPod [Yes, the letter "I" is significant to the Diva]
3. Case for both the iPad and iPod [She covered everything!!!]
4. Zoo! Zoo! pets [That would be Zhu Zhu]
5. Ariel vanity set
6. Nintendo DS
7. Nintendo DS games
8. Wii games for girls [She is such a DIVA]
9. Barbie Jet
10. Barbie stuff
11. Barbie camera
12. Barbies
13. Crayons, markers, and other art stuff [Because the 4,689 markers, crayons, and colored pencils that are currently floating around our house are not enough]
14. Pocketbooks [She takes after her momma]
15. Rainboots
16. puzzles
17. Games
18. Baby Alive All Gone [She's got a baby brother - what does she need with a baby doll that pees and poops?]
Every few days she adds things to the list. I hope Santa has patience and a wad of cash!!

Gabe's list was short and sweet:
1. Mans [Like action figures...and again, he's got 679 already]
2. Cars [He also has 8,647 of these]
3. A Batman Cave [Hey, if Christian Bale comes with it I am all over that one!!!]
4. Baseball hat, baseball glove, baseball bat, and a baseball suit [Funny, he didn't ask for the baseball.]
Of course when he's watching TV or in the store he wants EVERYTHING he sees.

I had to pry Cooper's list out of him [and it's written on a napkin] :
1. Oregon attire [The boy lives 3000 miles from Oregon, lives in the backyard of some truly awesome college football, and has never been to Oregon yet he's the Ducks biggest fan.]
2. Under Armour
3. Skull candy headphones [Old school that cost about 28 times more than a set of regular headphones]
4. Jerseys - LeBron James, Kareem Abdul Jabaar [How does he know him?], and a Miami Heat. [He wants the authentic ones too. Is "Santa" made of money or what?]
5. Drums
6. Wii Games
7. High top Zigs [Why didn't I come up with Silly Bandz and squiggly bottomed Reeboks? Where is the justice in this world?]
8. Boots

And finally, Molly Moo [Who is the hardest kid to buy for because she never has liked the stuff most kids like - go figure.]
1. Under Armour [Really? We keep them in business.]
2. Books [I love, love, love the fact that books are always on her list - that's my girl]
3. Music [She would be happy with $600 worth of iTunes gift cards]
4. Clothes [She was extremely specific about what she wanted and from where...she kills me...no surprising her!!!]
5. Camera

Needless to say, we have our work cut out for us. Good thing I live with Santa. [You thought his name was Craig but this time of year the budget Nazi throws caution to the wind and actually relishes spending every last dime. I wish I could get a little of that love when I mention I saw some cool boots on sale.] The man loves him some Christmas shopping. He is the happiest man on Christmas Eve when it's time to get the loot and put it out...I love it!! Just one more thing that I adore about being married to him ♥

This is what I want for Christmas:
1. Time in the kitchen to bake for teachers, at church and school, friends, and family
2. The smells of cinnamon and cloves cooking on the stove
3. To bake with my girls, my mom, and my sister
4. Breakfast at my parents house for Christmas Eve
5. To have paper thrown at me by Greg and Dewayne at Aunt Clara's house
6. Gifts that sit under the tree and tease the children [And Craig - he's worse than any of them about gifts - TRUST ME!]
7. Carollers at my house
8. New PJs from my mom ♥
9. The love and hugs of my children and my husband ♥
10. Several nights of Christmas Vacation and A Christmas Story
Last but no least....
11. Joy [And there is a lot of that here already....God is so good]
It really is the most wonderful time of the year ♥

Consider it Pure Joy ♥

I have struggled today and it is evident tonight. It is almost midnight and I feel so sick. I've made myself sick with worry and anger and disappointment and humiliation and sadness. [Might want to Google "How to make Eggnog" right now...]

I truly, truly love teaching....but today was one of those days that makes you think that being pecked to death, slowly, by chickens must be similar to teaching middle schoolers. [Seriously]

Yet, I know that most of them are functioning on hormone highs and their brains are NOT working. [Seriously, there is research on the brain that says children at this age actually show regression in brain cells - as if we needed to pay some fancy, smancy researcher to know that. Spend a day with one of them - it is OBVIOUS.] So I should use my entire brain [Yes, I have one] to make decisions to:
A. Overlook some things
B. Choose my battles carefully [Not everything is worth making a huge deal out of]
C. Smile and say things like, "Honey I love you...even when you are mean and nasty to me" or "I don't understand why you are doing this but I'm willing to work with you to make it better for you." [Some of you have done some MAJOR eye rolling - You'll get over it.]
D. Love my job and the 100 reasons [aka students] that keep me teaching.

Sometimes it takes a step back and some deep thinking to get a better perspective. It's not worth being sick or sad or frustrated - there are too many good things about teaching middle schoolers like:
A. They will laugh at lame jokes [most of the time]
B. They love to listen to stories [and they will ask me to tell them if it means they don't have to work...and I gladly oblige them]
C. They do some crazy things that make me look WAY normal [and I laugh at them too]
D. They listen to my iPod with few complaints [I even challenged them a few times to guess the artists...of course I picked songs that I knew they wouldn't know...I didn't have the five dollars I bet them!!!]
E. Rarely do they let you forget when you owe them a treat [They won't bring a pencil for 6 straight days but they will remember you said you'd half a half of piece of gum with them - bizarre]
F. Some of the things they say and do in the hall give me tons of stuff to laugh about
G. They are "stuck" in the middle....someone needs to LOVE them :)

With all that being said, tomorrow will be a better day. Someone shared this with me yesterday and it is so appropriate for today.

James 1:2-3 ~ Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.

It's all about faith. Faith in my ability to be the teacher that not only imparts knowledge [Impressive I know] but the teacher that loves them [even when they are not being loveable material]. Faith that they will take the knowledge that I share and use it in a way that helps them learn. Faith that I can lead them to make wise decisions by the example I set. Faith that no matter what, in the good and bad times, that there is a reason why God put me in the classroom.

I am not perfect...that was evident today. I will fail [miserabely it seems here lately] and I will make bad decisions and I will be unloveable too. My prayers came fast and were many today. I read this verse and I know that I, like James, should consider all of today's events pure joy.

Tomorrow [well, today since it's 12:27am] will be a good day.

Things

In the spirit of Thanksgiving here are things [including people, ideas, and a random assortment of all kinds of stuff] that I want to give thanks for:

1. My God - The infinite and mighty Jesus Christ.

2. Craig - He puts up with so much junk from me [stop nodding your heads in agreement] and he loves me in spite of me. He makes me laugh [and cry on occasion] and he makes me feel safe when he's around. He is the love of my life ♥

3. Molly - She is awesome and my sweet baby.

4. Cooper - His name will be in lights one day...either playing football or performing stand up. The kid is HILARIOUS!

5. Emma - Where would I be without the Diva? She makes me laugh when her deep belly laugh resonates through the house. She is one of a kind.

6. Gabe - He is a scream and the most bull headed of all four of my children [He takes after his daddy with that one....yeah, right.] He is gorgeous and looks like an angel when he's asleep [And I know that because here lately he's been doing ALOT of sleeping in my bed.]

7. My mom - She is a role modelfor me as a mother, a Christian, a wife, and a person. She's my shoulder to lean on, my voice of reason, and she rocked the Tri!

8. My dad - He is the most awesome dad a girl could ever have. He's always been a part of my life and continues to give me words of wisdom, comfort and inspiration. He will always be my hero.

9. Teaching - What other job in the world has as much influence on the lives of our adolescents? [I know - way over the top - but it sounds good.] Seriously, I ♥ my job. The kids are the coolest [and the strangest - 8th graders do and say some really bizzaro things] and science is fun. [Yes, I am a geek.]

10. First Baptist Church of KM - I can not say enough about this wonderfully awesome place. My family has never felt more welcomed, cared for, and spiritually challenged as we have at this church.

11. Sonja (my mother in law) - What an inspiration she's been to me. She raised four kids, mostly as a single parent, and continues to be an integral part of the lives of her grandchildren and great grandchildren. [Plus, she taught me how to make biscuits.]

12. Myrtle Towery - What a saint this woman was! I had the opportunity to be with her as she passed into Heaven and I will never forget it. In fact, I spent most of her last week with her. She had the patience of Job and never, ever faltered in her faith. She had the most giving heart - I want to be like her when I grow up.

13. Sophie Ruth - She came into our family as an answer to many prayers. She completed the lives of Chris and Summer in a way that I will never know. She is amazing and I ♥ her.

14. Summer - Where do I begin? She is my best friend and my shoulder to lean on...she takes care of me and my family when we need help....she loves me for me.....and she also rocked the Tri! She is an amazing person.

15. My freedom - We live in such a wonderful country. It is so easy to take for granted the freedom to worship where we choose, to go to the store when we want to, and to get a free, public education. Thanks to ALL the Veterans that have made this possible.

16. Books - I heart reading!! I will read almost anything [except the classics - I hate those] and my fave is true crime and scary stories.

17. My education - I have had many opportunities in my 37 years to get smarter [some I took - some I did not]. I am a high school graduate, a college graduate [It was extremely hard squeezing four years into six but somehow I managed], I have my Master's degree, and I am a National Board Certified teacher. I don't say all of this to brag but to say that I am thankful that I had the resources, the ability, and the family that supported me through all of these accomplishments.

18. Music - There is always some kind of music going in our house. We listen to all genres [big word huh?] and most of the time we are watching music on TV too. If you looked at my iPod you would find Johnny Cash, John Mayer, David Crowder Band, Anberlin, White Lion, Third Day, and Jimmy Buffett. [If I could get a hold of an Air Supply and Quiet Riot album those would be on there too.]

19. Living in KM - Getting here brought us full circle and something we've worked on for four years.

20. Tommy Hall - We would not be in KM if it were not for the persistence and awesome generosity of this man. We could never thank him enough!

21. The Wilsons - I cannot explain the how but I know that I am forever in their debt for all they have done for my family. There are not many "true" friends in this world but they are what I consider the best.

22. The Kales - My girl, Stacy, keeps me laughing, lets me vent, and encourages me every step of the way. Her awesome family is so much like my family. They are some of the coolest and most precious people I know and I'm glad to call them the best also!!

23. Beth T. - I cannont imagine going through some of the years of teaching without her by my side. She is such an amazingly awesome and dedicated teacher. God has truly put her in the right place and she is doing exactly what she has been called to do. I love you Beth!

24. Mindy H. - Inspiration to the nth degree!!! What a truly cool woman she is and her strength and courage are a blessing to everyone. Continue to pray for her as she tells breast cancer to SHOVE IT!

25. Jenny C. - My friend, my partner in crime [If they only knew....] , and one of the totally coolest women in my life! She's another that is doing exactly what God has asked her to do with her life.

26. Sue L. - I love her family, I love her, and I love the fact that she left a one career [nursing] to be such an inspirational teacher!!

27. My grandmother - Thank you God for the time I had with her. When I'm in the kitchen, cooking up a storm, I'd like to think she is smiling down on me. [She is the reason I love fatback....she used to sneak it to me...shhh - don't tell my daddy.] And I had the opportunity to be see her pass into the arms of God - an experience I wouldn't take back for any amount of money.

28. Cookbooks - My grandmother left a collection of cookbook behind and I got a lot of them [Craig was none to happy to see them come home] and I love using them. Some of them have dog eared pages, some of them have spills, and some have hand-written recipes in them. A little piece of her here with me.

29. Love - I look around and I am in love with my family. Usually weekend mornings are spent piled up in my bed [that is only queen sized] with all the Shorties [morning breath and morning hair and all] . I don't deserve this much love. I thank my God for all the hugs and kisses ♥

30. Trees - Hey, if we didn't have them then we wouldn't have oxygen [I am a science teacher] but most importantly we wouldn't have leaves. Then I wouldn't have an excuse to rake them up so my kids could run through them and take silly pictures.

31. Money - I don't have much [trust me] but every time we need something it is there. I've begun to trust [Craig is almost there....] that the Lord will provide. There are needs and there are wants [OMG...I sound like my daddy] and you have to figure out the difference. I'm not thankful that there is money but thankful that the Lord provides - always.

32. Football season - I love nothing better than to watch my Craig on the sidelines on Friday nights. He is doing exactly what God called him to do. He gets frustrated [watch his hat on Friday nights and you'll know when he's frustrated] and sometimes he doesn't realize how much of a positive impact he's having on these young men that he coaches. They may not remember a play but they will remember that he loved them...and that is what matters most.

33. Fastpitch softball - I get to watch my Molly Moo play and my favorite coach do his thang!!

34. Mr. Marty - He made my first year at KMMS a great one. He introduced me to cornhole on the computer and Homestar Runner, made me laugh by saying he was a Kentucky State graduate, and is a super cool teacher.

35. The Bible - WOW...what more can I say? When you need a word [reminds of sweet Mickey Heyward] then there is but one place to go - the Bible.

36. Tim and Andrea Whitesides - I cannot imagine not going to Calgary this past summer. What an amazing and breathtaking experience. These are two of the most amazing people in all the world because God spoke and they listened.

37. My Salvation - One man, sent to change the world, died on a cross so that I could have eternal life. It is hard to believe when you truly think about.

38. Stephanie (Steffi) - She's been my BFF since meeting in Mrs. Morton's third grade class. Years and life have sent us in seperate directions but I cannot imagine my life without her in it - she knows lots of things about me [Good, Bad, and Ugly] and she still loves me for me.

39. Memories - I have so many fond memories of growing up in a loving and caring household, with parents that always made me believe I could and would do anything. I see, as a parent and a teacher, how important that is for kids. So many kids do not live in the kind of house I grew up in and that is so sad. I am thankful for those memories that remind me of how blessed I am and always have been.

40. Andrew R. - I wasn't sure if I would fit in at KMMS after all of those years of elementary school [Middle school teachers aren't really into the cute little bulletin boards and games] and I know science but not like these 8th grade science teachers. But, from day one, Andrew helped show me the ropes. We laugh together [sometimes when we shouldn't] and I think he's one of the coolest people ever. [Plus, he likes Wal Mart and taxis as much as I do] .

41. Lisa M. - If you want to meet a saint here on Earth then she's the one you need to meet. I love her because she is genuine, she is giving, and she is down to earth. She has guided me and helped me out so much [and she's made me a fall in love with Hallmark stores]. I will forever be indebted to her for so many things.

42. Lori W. - If you ever get the chance to come to Overflow Cafe at FB of KM then you need to come. The glory of the Lord shines right through her as she sings - it is amazing. Not to mention, she is super smart and an awesome leader. I am glad that we crossed paths because she's inspired me in so many ways.

43. Running - I am not a good runner - at all. [Some of you are well aware of that...painfully aware...it is painfull to watch me run.] But, I love to run. I think it is liberation and freedom from the stresses of everyday life. I need to be more diligent with my training [but it's so hard with a full time job and four kids] and I've made a promise to myself to dedicate more time to running.

44. Donna L. - She makes me laugh [Whatever] and she is a hoot to work with! I have watched her help students and families without anyone knowing that she was helping them. She has a heart for giving.

45. Shane C. - Even though he's the Lonewolf, he's pretty dang cool! He's a wonderful father and his faith is constantly out there, for the world to see.

46. Margo - She has such a huge heart. She always sees the good in a situation, even when it feels hopeless. That is such a breath of fresh air and I thank her for that quality.

47. All of my former teachers - Thank you, thank you, thank you! Thank you for grading all those papers, for staying up late to plan cool lessons, for inspiring me, for imparting knowledge, for challenging me, for your critical eyes and your big hearts.

48. Matt B. - "Lookie, lookie, lookie...Missy's got a cookie!" He so busted me in band class with food yet I still love him to death. He's listened to me whine and cry, laugh and giggle, and he's always got a joke [or three] that makes me double over in laughter. He is a special and wonderful friend and I'm glad, that all these years later, that we are still friends.

49. Robin T. - She was my mentor during student teaching and still an inspiration. Her faith is unwavering and she lives her life as evidence of that fact. She is gentle, kind, loving and passionate about her job. I still have stuff that I did while doing my student teaching. She gave me Bible verses, advice, and most of all, she challenged me to be the best at my job. I could never, ever repay her....thank you Robin.

50. The Griggs - If you know them then you love them. [If you don't know them then you are missing out.] La La is the best kid EVER!! She is genuine and loving and amazingly gorgeous. Her attitude is infectious and she's done great things for my family. Her parents are equally as amazing. I am so blessed to have them in my life!

51. Jay R. - I love you dearly. I am so blessed to have had you in my life all these years. Your courage is hard to match. I am so proud of what you've done and I look forward to watching your life in years to come.

52. My Sunday School Class(es) - I am a member of two awesome Sunday school classes. One, the adult class, is so much fun. We laugh, we cry, we share, and we learn. It is nice to be a part of such a great group of Christian couples. The other, my 7th and 8th grade girls is an absolute scream. They are so loud but so loveable. I am blessed to be a part of both classes.

53. Inlaws (Butch, Jill, Lacey, Erin, Dustin, Dax, Kandace, Darren, Abbee, Parker, Jan, Tim, Jodi, Fuller, Zoie, Elijah, and Sonja] - I cannot say enough about the family I gained when I married Craig. They take care of us [food, clothes, love, money, time, babysitting...you name it and they've done it.] Craig and I would not be where we are today without their guidance and support.

54. Karrie D. - What a truly amazing woman! Beautiful and strong, smart and inspriring - the whole package. She has an enormous heart and she listens to God's call in her life.

55. Josh S. - My Homie!! Love talking to him [he is hysterically funny] , love teaching with him, and I love the fact that he is a walking encyclopedia of sports.

56. The Office - The funniest show EVER! What kind of world would it be without beets, bears, and Battlestar Galactiga? That's what she said!!!

57. Angela Mc. - Energy and spunk don't even describe this girl! I love hanging out with her, running [well she runs and I walk] with her, and working with her.

58. Every single student I ever taught - Kids are amazing. They can make you laugh [and cry] ...they will tell you if they like something [and definitely if they don't like something]. We have so much to learn from them so pay close attention to what they have to say.

59. Shelley P. - Syrup and weanies is all I have to say....and when I throw my gum let's hope it goes farther than the hood of someone's car next time. Shelley's my college buddy and the one who helped me get through organic chem. She sort of helped set me and Short up and she was there for the birth of my first child. She is a strong Christian woman with a whole new world to conquer and I love her!

60. KMMS - I love my job and I love teaching middle school.

61.Tammie H. - She makes me laugh and she loves my Emma ♥

62 Laughter - There is absolutely nothing better than hearing my children laugh.

63. Food on the table - I cannot imagine not having food to eat or feed my children yet I know there are many that go without. I am so very thankful that we don't have to worry where our next meal is coming from and that we have more than our share.

64. Health - All you have to do is look around at any local church bulletin to see the multitudes of people that are sick and suffering - thankfully, I do not have to endure that in my own family. My kids are healthy [though a little derainged at times....meet their dad...that would explain it all....] and Craig and I are too. Yet, all around me, there are those that are suffering from chastrophic illness and disease. Thank you God for your healing hand, be it physical healing or a healing in Heaven you always have a plan.

I could write so many more things. As things come to my mind I will add them. I hope I don't offend people by adding them [or not adding them] because it's not meant to be that way. I felt lead to say thanks and to give thanks via my blog.

I challenge you to make your own list. And pray over it - for the people, the things, the random stuff. Thanks for letting me share :)

We Are Family

The picture says it all....maybe we spent too much time raking leaves today. It was just too funny and started like this:
And then I got the idea of getting them all together...and of course, taking a picture. [Cooper says I'm "gay" for taking all of these pictures. He will eat those words one day when he needs a cool picture of himself. I won't share - I swear.]

So now you know that you don't have to watch Alaska: Sarah Palin's reality [Does she know what is reality? Is she really in Alaska? Can she see Russia from her back porch? When was the war of 1812?] TV show ~ you can just keep up with the Shorts. This has to be better than fishing and without that annoying accent. [Ooops...I made a political statement with that statement. That is not usually my soap box. I like to complain about hot chocolate.]

Well both my boys lost their respective football games this weekend. The Mountaineers had a tough draw on Friday night and then Coop's team lost on Saturday too. Sort of bittersweet because I sure will enjoy having both home during the week yet I love watching Craig coach on Friday nights and watching Coop play on Saturdays. [Just gives us more time to do stupid things like taking pictures with our heads in our shirts]

In other, more pressing news [I know this is what you've been waiting on] I've not had a diet Sundrop since THURSDAY morning. That would be three days....72 hours...and counting. Not to say that I didn't want one but I fought the urge [and a few times the urge punched me hard in the gut...but I've been victorious...so far....] and refused to buy one. I'll probably have enough saved from not buying them to go on a cruise or at least buy some really nice boots. AND [drum roll] I rode my bike with a friend from church and hopefully [fingers and toes crossed] she and I will get ride alot more together in the future. Molly's got a plan for helping me continue to find the old me [Did I tell you how cool she truly is? She's cool ♥] and I'm hoping to check out the Y tomorrow about the gift certificate. It's all going to work out :) [Plus, I whooped Cooper at bowling on the Wii tonight - SWEET!]

Looking forward to a great week, with all the Shorts at home for a change. Life is good [and a little goofy] at the Short house. Don't forget to do something nice for someone this week!!!

Random Acts

First of all let me begin by saying a big THANKS to all of my peeps out there...thanks for the words of encouragement, for the offers to help me, for the advice on eating, for the websites, and most of all, for simply praying for me. I know I can do this ~ especiallly with wonderful people like you on my side.

So I check my mailbox at school today and there is an interoffice envelope, addressed to me [Thanks Captain Obvious - you just said it was in YOUR mailbox] but it did not have a return address. I opened it up to find a simple hand-written note: "Hope this helps you get motivated" that was attached to a gift certificate to the YMCA that is good for a two month membership! [Can you say, "WOW!" with me?] What a cool surprise...and better yet, I have NO idea who sent it. And really, that isn't important. [I mean it is because I would like to say thank you but not because this person did this because they wanted to help me out.] I appreciate this one simple act more than you know...thank you.

Random Acts of Kindness....are they really that hard? My guess is no. I mean think about it - it doesn't take much to make someone's day now does it? [Even those of you that are picky, ornery, and otherwise hard to please can find something to smile about] Just think how far one random act might go...it would be so cool to track it somehow.

Even more than this, we owe it to the children we are raising to TEACH them how to perform random acts of kindness. We spend way too much time [I am raising my hand] worrying about ourselves. Spend some of that energy doing one small, kind deed for another person. You will feel good :)

In Short news, Gabe [aka The Preschool Bully] had a much better day at nursery today. [Does it get any worse than nearly impaling another child's eye with squirrel food?] He even gave Molly some advice on dealing with some drama: Sissy, just run your mouth back to him. Can't argue with that can you?

However, we've gone to performing DAILY exorcism on Emma. For some reason, getting out of bed and getting ready for school is simply overrated and NOT on the Diva's "To Do" list. [Like EVERY day] Seriously, Short and I are ready to pull our hair out. [And bless him but he doesn't have much to pull out] My suggestion is to put her in the bed, dressed for the next day, and just let her roll out, brush her teeth, and get going. [Don't think I won't try it people]

And I have but two tiny complaints tonight: I sat in the freezing cold on Saturday night to walk Molly play ball. The "nice" man at the concession [I mean armed robbery] stand ran out of hot chocolate at 7pm. Really? The coldest night of the year and you are out of hot chocolate? EVERYONE is outside - it's SOFTBALL. Ok, fast forward about two hours later, and Molly, Emma, and myself just want a cup of hot chocolate from McDonald's. Oh no - they close up the McCafe at 9pm...OMG. Seriously? You serve food all night but you can't mix up some hot chocolate after the hot chocolate witching hour of 9pm? Is there some hot chocolate wizard that will zap your privileges if you make it after this point? I was not a happy camper [Technically I was not a camper at all but you get the picture] I yelled, as I drove past the drive thru window, "You Suck!" [I am such a great role model for my children]

My other is this: I love teaching. I love everything about the job. I don't even look at like a job [most of the time] and I certainly don't do it for the money. If I could go into further detail I would [but as you know someone is always watching what you type] so I will leave it at this:

You can't let praise or criticism get to you. It is a weakness to get caught up in either one ~ John Wooden.

I look forward to keeping you in the loop on the getting in shape thing. As always, life is good :)

Fattitude

Tonight's post ain't about the Short children...it's about me. [I know that some of you, after that one statement, googled "How to make a turkey puppet" - to heck with ya....] I am fat. Not just gained a little weight around the middle - I am F-A-T. [As in: Give me an F! (F!) Give me an A! (A!) Give me a T! (T!)] I am so mad at myself....why did I let myself go? Really...is there an excuse good enough to justify this?
1. I don't have time to exercise. [I really don't but I could rearrange some things and make time...but I haven't]
2. I don't have anyone to exercise with me. [Well poor pitiful me....]
3. I like to eat. [Well who doesn't?]
4. I'm lazy. [I don't consider myself a lazy person - I don't mind working - but I've gotten lazy since the tri...well, really before the tri....]

So my list of excuses is out there for you to see. [I'm vulnerable now.]

I am writing this to ask for your help. I need some champions in my corner. I need some peeps that are extremely good at motivating others. I need some of you that are good at working out on a regular basis to get behind me and help me out. I need ideas, encouragement, ALOT of PRAYERS, and someone [or some people] checking on me. Will you help me out? [Don't make me beg.....] Of course, you can comment here, on Facebook, via Twitter (@Pigskinchick), or through email (pigskinchick@gmail.com). I really, totally value any comments, suggestions, ideas, etc. that you have for me.

I like to run and I have made myself a promise to get going with that again. I enjoyed the tri but right now I don't have the money to pay $4 to swim daily so I'm going to try to swimming at least twice a week, and I got my bike fixed up so I can ride alot. My first order of business is to get back out there, running, and to STOP drinking diet Sundrop. [For fear of complete embarassment I will NOT share how much DSD I consume on a daily basis - but it's a lot - like an IV and a pole would be better than what I'm doing....my kidneys hate me] Addiction is hard - maybe I should try an Intervention...or a bottle of water.

Weird thought, but when Molly is with me, around other people, I fear that people think she will end up looking like me [FAT] since I looked just like she does when I was her age. I never used to worry about gaining weight or being FAT...now I worry I'll be this way forever. She is so athletic and fit and I need to be a better role model for her and Emma.

I just don't want to feel this way anymore. I worked so hard three years ago to lose weight. I've run in 5ks and done a triathlon. I earned my National Boards and a Master's degree with four kids. I can get a plan and stick to it....I have to...for me...for my family...for my health. [I want to be around to drive my kids crazy in my old age]

Thanks, in advance, for your prayers, your encouragement, and your suggestions. I'll let you know how it is going.

Molly ♥

I don't blog alot about Molly...and that would be because most of my ranting and raving consists of the craziness at my house. Molly is the only normal one here. But today I want to share a little bit about my Molly.

Molly is the oldest [and it kills her that her brother is bigger, taller, and older looking than her] and by far the most normal of the Shorties [that includes myself and Craig included]. Molly has shaped our lives, for the better, in so many ways. She has been with Craig and I through a lot [I know - it is a shocker that she has turned out as normal as she has considering the two bafoons that have raised her - miracles do happen]. Without divulging too much information, [yeah, right] Molly came into our lives before we were married. [With that being said, I told my dad after my FIRST date with Craig that I would marry him so no, we didn't just get married because we had Molly] There were times, early on, when we were not sure we could take care of her financially - diapers, formula, food, gas, rent - it adds up when the income coming in ain't much. She sometimes went to class with me at UNCC and my sweet Granny Towery kept her for us. Molly didn't have cute little dresses and fancy clothes that every mom dreams about dressing her baby girl in - we could barely afford to eat. If it hadn't been for family, she might have been naked and homeless. And I can remember back to the times when she would sing and dance for us and it makes me smile. She kept us going when we didn't think we would ever make it. God always has a plan doesn't He?

Now I look at all of the things she is and stands for and I can't help but smile and be proud. [No, I don't give myself credit] She is amazing. Her brothers and sister never have to worry because she always takes care of them. She babysits, she bathes them, [Not Cooper because that would be bizarre and super uncomfortable] she feeds them, she loves them, she comforts them, and she protects them. She's always been a pleaser so giving 200% when only 100% is required is nothing unusual. She is grounded in her values [which I would like to think her dad and I had a little say in] and totally committed to her faith.

She's also a little goofy and quirky [Goofy = Mom and Quirky = Dad]. She has this particular routine in the mornings and if you mess with her it throws her off. [For example, Craig moved her mousse and put it in a different spot - she had a fit...little quirky....llike her daddy...] She only has one speed - S L O W. She loves to dance but she doesn't want anyone to know that she is a good dancer because that might mean she's a little more girlie than she wants to let on. [Tomboy = Mom] She is a night owl - you practically have to beg her to go to bed. And she loves mushrooms, fried baloney [or bologna for those of you who think I can't spell] , and cookie dough.

I am proud to be her mom....I ♥ you Molly :) I often tell her that I want to be just like her when I grow up...and I do.

Why?

There have been many why moments in my life this week. Some of them are funny like these:

• Why did my three year old son pull his pants down and moon all of his three and four year old friends? [I should not have to explain this to anyone who knows his father should I?]
• Why does Cooper talk incessantly about random and bizarre things? [I mean really? We only drive about 1/2 a mile to get to work and he drives me nuts!!!]
• Why does Emma turn into Regan, the possessed chick from the Exorcist, every morning at 6:45am?

And others are not so funny:

• Why would a parent hurt their own child?
• Why is there so much apathy in the world? [I betcha didn't know I knew big words did ya?]
• Why is becoming more and more acceptable to pass the buck...to blame someone else....to shirk responsibilities?

I am honestly trying to look past some things that have happened this week but sometimes I really wonder why? Then I am reminded of a favorite song of mine....

And I say, "Jesus bring the rain....