You Know Them 3 Motors Beside the House?

Home today with the Gabester - he has strep. I guess that whole "I feel like I gotta stick in my throat and my ear" thing was for real. Bless his heart...now comes the chore of trying to take the medicine. So far he's spit it on me three times [much like one of those spitting monkeys you see at the zoo.] I'll just let Short deal with it when he gets home....

When Gabe and I went to get said medicine I was privy to a more than slightly interesting cell phone coversation going on on the aisle beside me. Since Gabe and I had like forever to kill [CVS time > real world time] we walked around the store and looked at EVERYTHING. Gabe listened to all the cards with sounds, checked out all the Valentine's candy, [and Easter candy - who wants to wake up to 2 month old Cadbury eggs from the CVS in their basket on Easter morning? I hope Mr. Easter Bunny procrastinates like me otherwise I wouldn't dive right into that candy...just sayin'] then we ended up on the aisle with the toys. Gabe officially has the next five birthday toy lists ready. It was here that I realized that some people should not be allowed to:

1. Speak in public.
2. Have a cell phone where they can hold conversations that we can only hear one side to [Really - at least put it on speaker phone so we know why Bubba got arrested at the tattoo parlor] .
3. Subject the rest of the world to their Enquirer envious lives.

I will admit that I have walked through the grocery store with my cell phone, while having a conversation, but if the matter I am speaking about is:
a. Gross [You talk about gross stuff too]
b. Personal
c. In reference to someone or an incident then I try to stay in my car or tell the person at the other end we'll have to talk later. I think we are all guilty of public cell phone conversations...I just hope they were a little more civilized than some I've heard lately.

Woman: What the H is wrong with this card? I'm up here at the CVS.
[something said by other person]
Woman: Well H***! You know what they did? You know them 3 motors sitting by the house? And that tent that keeps blowin' up in the yard that we keep taking down? And that other stuff we got sittin' in the yard? Well they fined yer daddy for that. They said we got 30 days to get rid of them or we gonna have to pay the fine.
[something else said by the other person]
Woman: Well [I think she got a special at the CVS on this world] I reckon we'll go down thar and clean it up. We'll just take them kids [Here Johnny, put this motor from the Pinto on your back and carry it to the buildin'] and clean it up. I reckon we will.
[yet another something being said on the phone by the other person]
Woman: Well [Whoda thunk that she was gonna use that word?] I reckon I talk to you when I git home. I guess we'll just git it clean on Saturday.

Well there are a few lessons we can glean from this folks:
Lesson #1: If you are going to remove the motors from three of your cars maybe the yard isn't the place for them.
Lesson #2: If a tent blows up in your yard then I guess you can do one of two things - find the owner or go camping.
Lesson #3: When CVS says they are having a sale on the word "Well" then run and get you some.

Public cell phone conversations can be as bad as standing in line at the Wal-Mart [You can't just say "Wal-Mart" - you have to say "THE Wal-Mart]. But that's another blog for another day...

Well [I wasn't going to miss out on that sale] I guess it's time to see if the Spitting Monkey [aka Gabe] will take the medicine. Wish me luck....