Disclaimer

I am writing this blog because I like to write. 

It is therapy.  

I write it, most of the time, late at night when the Shorties are fast asleep.

I write from my heart.   

I write about things from my perspective. [And yes, my opinion.  It's MY blog.] Often, I don't get it correct, I don't say things the write way [see what I did there....play on words and all], and I am certainly not the authority on anything [except the Shorties].  Never said I was.

I do allow things to bother me that I shouldn't and I have to pray about those things. 

Daily. 

Sometimes hourly. 

Often, in the past, I allowed others to tell me how I should or shouldn't feel about things going on in my life.   

I can think for myself.  

I am certainly not looking for affirmation from anyone when I post about how I feel.  I personally, really, and truly do not care if a single soul takes anything to heart when I am ranting on about how I feel when it comes to this or that.  That is the beauty of it...free will.   

I spend a lot of time [as I very well should] looking inward and asking for God's mercy and grace to save me from myself.  I read and re-read scripture, often just looking for the right words to use when I write and when I speak and when I listen.  But I need to read more and study more and live the scriptures more. 

Writing is cathartic [bet you won't hear a carnie using that word at the fair] for me. I'm not good at talking.  [What?  The kids in my classes think I drone on and on and on....]  I'm not good at letting others know how I feel about things, especially when my feelings are hurt.  So I write.  

Maybe I should keep it to myself  [like a secret journal] or be more private with my emotions.  I have found, though, in being honest and open that MANY people out there struggle with the things I struggle with so that makes me feel somewhat relieved. 

• Relieved to know that lots of people pray for me and with me.
• Relieved to know that other people's lives [as magnificent and wonderful as they make them seem on Facebook] are faced with as many challenges as I am being a mom to four, a wife, a sister, a daughter, etc.
• Relieved to know that its ok if I don't receive any validation for my thoughts or if I get criticized that the Good Lord will still allow the sun to shine.

I write all this to say that you don't have to agree with me or see things my way.  And I'm fine with that...really. 

In my last post I wrote about my children and some things going on that bothered me.  I debated over those words and if I should share anything about how I felt.  Words typed are not like words spoken and emotions can get tangled up.  

I decided I was ready for the recoil. 
  
Like it or leave it.