Thankfully, by the absolute grace of God [if grace is an ocean we're all sinking], my sweet girl walked away with only 2nd degree burns on one hand. I say only because this could have been SO. MUCH. WORSE. As we were sitting at urgent care the night it happened I looked over to see an area behind her left ear with several hairs that were singed.
I am not good in a crisis. [Ask anyone that knows me well. I get upset, jump to conclusions, lose it, cry....I'm no good at all. One time a student had a seizure in the room next to me. Incidentally, they were watching the dreaded "puberty video". I freaked out. Absolutely freaked out. I thought they were going to take me to the hospital instead of him.] Yet, even when I pulled into the driveway to a huge fireball coming out the door, I didn't get upset. [In a sense that I fell apart. I was upset just not in the mom-has-lost-it kind of upset.] I got the kiddos calmed down [Gabe and Emma were both in the far reaches of the back yard, wailing as if they were on fire] and quickly assessed the damage to Molly's hand - she didn't even know she was severely burned. We threw open all the windows and headed to urgent care.
And I never, ever lost control. Score one for staying cool.
But, I'd be lying if I didn't tell the rest of the story....
Things always happen when Craig isn't here. The next night, in the midst of a late night conversation about what happened, I lost it. I screamed, head in the pillow, at the thought of what could have happened. [Never think about what could happen....]
- Her entire head and body could have been engulfed in flames.
- Emma and/or Gabe could have been engulfed in flames.
When I allowed myself to think about what could have happened it scared me senseless. For that few minutes I let all of that just hit the ceiling while my sweet husband just listened. I sobbed "thank you" to God over and over and over again.
I lost it. Completely and utterly lost it.
Molly was upset about the damage to the kitchen. My response to her? "Damn the kitchen. You are OK." [Yes. I cursed. Sorry.] I didn't even bat an eye at the damage. Who cares? It is stuff. I'm not defined by my stuff or lack of stuff. I can get more stuff or I can throw away the damaged stuff and not worry about it. That doesn't matter to me one bit. Times like this are why you have insurance.
I already have the check in hand.
American Restoration is working on getting everything back in order [and I would highly recommend them to anyone who needs any restoration work done for fire, smoke, or water damage].
Molly's hand is healing. [Just a side note here: I know people who have cried over fender benders in parking lots...because of damage to their car! Really? I don't want to be remembered as a person who drove a nice car or one who decorated really well. (And honestly, there isn't any chance I'll be remembered for either of those things....)]
My daughter is alive. My children are OK. My house is livable.
God is good.
God is so gracious.
God will always do more than we could ever imagine.
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