Can I Just Become a Hobo?

I have put off writing this post for a few months...not because there is anything catastrophic about what I am going to write but mostly because I feel like I've failed. [I ain't fishin' for your compliments just bein' totally honest.]

Middle school has been really tough this year.

And not much fun.

I am struggling in a big way.

I love teaching.  I love the excitement of being in the classroom when the kids "get it".  I love talking to my classes about my own children and the getting to know them.  I love introducing them to my 80s Pandora station and them making jokes about my age.  I love their humor and quirks.  I love science. [Nerd Alert]  I love talking to the kids in my classes when we are walking back and forth to lunch.  I love when they laugh at my corny jokes. 

This year is different. I've never seen so much defiance and entitlement from children.  I've never felt so small and insignificant as I do this year. [Please don't get me wrong here.  I am not looking to be recognized or thanked for anything.]

Aretha said it well...R - E - S - P - E - C - T.  

Be respectful.  
Be nice.
Be kind.
Be thankful.
Be considerate of others.
Be responsible.
Be ready to suffer consequences for negative actions.
Be resilient. 

We are creating a generation of people that can't simply "be" anymore because that is too hard.  There is a sense of entitlement that says they don't have to be respectful if the rules do not mesh with the circumstances at hand. [Imma do me.] There is no resilience and determination to find the answer, to solve the problem, to be challenged. [Imma do me.]  Simple rules of etiquette and manners flew out the window. [Imma do me.] And certainly, there is very little push to make consequences match negative behaviors. [Imma do me.]

Excuse me if I'm wrong or out of line [I was at least one time before] but when did simply being 13 or 14 entitle you to say or do anything you feel when you disagree with an adult?  Ummmm....in my house and the house I grew up in that would be....NEVER. 

We have children questioning the tone we use with them. Really?  Are you kidding me? In my house that only got you into more trouble. In the house where I am the parent that gets you into trouble.  No, my parents were not perfect but they had expectations for me and taught me to have them for myself.  My own children do not act like baffoons at school because they know the consequences will be worse at home.  BUT above all, they are respectful to adults, even if they disagree.  

Actually heard a parent say, just recently, "Well so and so is going to smart off if your tone insinuates that you are trying to be smart." So and so is 13! So and so doesn't get to decide that the tone of an adult's voice is not what they like and then make a choice not to listen.  If a child is asked to stop, to listen, to sit down, to follow directions, to get to class, to stop being loud at the lunch, or to do the task at hand then the answer is ALWAYS, "Yes ma'am." or "Yes sir."  END of discussion.        

No consequences.
No sense of responsibility to anyone but yourself.
No desire to be challenged.

The sad thing about all of this is that I am literally beating myself up over all of this and how to "fix" it. I am a pleaser.  A fixer. My hair is falling out.  I cannot sleep.  My stomach hurts.

I pray about this all the time. I know God hears me. There are positives and I am desperately trying to hang on to those things.  

And I know that I am not going to be some kind of hero and save them all and make them love science. [Or me.] 

But I do know that....
Everyone can be respectful. 
Everyone can be considerate.
Everyone can choose to reach their potential.

Stop making excuses for why you aren't following directions and simply do whatever is asked of you. Stop trying to do everything under the sun except what is being asked. Get to class on time. Sit up and pay attention.  Get some sleep at home so you can stay awake in class. Do your work.  Pick up your trash instead of walking right past it.  Take some initiative.  Get motivated. Bring a pencil to class. Follow directions the first time instead of when you are ready. Stop waiting for someone else to do things for you.  

Prove me wrong. I am waiting.