Goodbye Yellow Brick Road

I have been absent for a while because, quite frankly, my attitude sucked. [Might as well not beat around the bush.]  For the better part of a year I've been battling this inner turmoil...

You are too fat to be successful at running....give it up.

You are ugly.

Why would anyone want your help?

You are a terrible mother, wife, sister, daughter, friend teacher coworker....

So what did I do?  I listened to those things, so much so that I began to believe it all.  Then, this past Saturday, it was like someone literally hit me upside the head [who knows...might have been Gabe...or Craig...] and His voice said, "Good gravy girl!  Snap out of it.  I love you ~ what else matters?  Do it all in My name.  Do it for Me."

So what else is a girl to do when God is talking to her as she travels down 74 to the Pancake House in Shelby? I tell you what she does ~ she listens.  She says, "OK Lord.  I need your help because I am tired of who I've become.  I don't want to be this girl anymore.  I know that you love me....now help me love me."

Life ain't easy. [Thanks Captain Obvious]  Since hitting 40 I've felt so insignificant, old, and basically, washed up.  But what has been more apparent than anything else is that I am in control of nothing if I don't give it all up to God.  I have proven:

I cannot do this by myself.

Along with that nice little toe-stepper Saturday, then the sermon on Sunday was written just for me.  I wrote down one point and underlined it:

Your character affects your influence.

I need to reflect Godly character at home, at my job, with friends, everywhere. That cannot be done without being in tune with Christ.

That  cannot be done alone.

I need to give it all to Him.

I heard the hymn, It is Well, as I was getting out of the car for Sunday school yesterday morning.

  


Goodbye to looking for something that can't be found ~ Utopia...Emerald City ....Easy Street.  

It is well with my soul.