This Moment is Enough

"Show me Your Glory"

Third Day

I caught a glimpse of Your splendor
In the corner of my eye
The most beautiful thing I've ever seen
And it was like a flash of lightning
Reflected off the sky
And I know I'll never be the same
Show me Your glory
Send down Your presence
I want to see Your face
Show me Your glory
Majesty shines about You
I can't go on without You, Lord
When I climb down the mountain
And get back to my life
I won't settle for ordinary things
I'm gonna follow You forever
And for all of my days
I won't rest 'til I see You again
Show me Your glory
Show me Your glory 
I can't live without You

Tomorrow morning, at 4:45am, I will leave my 15 year old son with a group of virtual strangers and send him 1754.56 miles [I looked it up....just saying "a lot" was not enough] on a mission trip in a foreign country. 

And at this moment in my life I am so very proud of the man he is becoming.  [Now, for those of you that know Coop you also realize that he is quite the goofball in most situations and to say he is worse at home is an understatement.]  He has grown into this man [Affectionately nicknamed Gigantor] that realizes that God has so much more planned for his life that he could ever, possibly imagine.  He was given the opportunity to take this trip after visiting my parents one weekend and going to their church.  The lady teaching his Sunday school class casually mentioned to my mom that he would be a great addition to their team, my parents talked to her husband [team leader], and God created a way for Cooper to be a part of this trip. [My dad, who has the heart of Jesus, graciously paid the expenses for Cooper to go on this trip.  How did I get so lucky to have such an amazing set of parents that are way cool grandparents?]  

He is nervous.  Phone contact will be limited for him.

I am nervous.  He will be in a third world country that he had to get vaccinations to visit...who wouldn't be nervous?

Yet, with all the anxiety about things that I have no control over, I have this inner peace that God is doing something so wonderful with my son.  God is giving him an opportunity to be speak the gospel and to let others witness Jesus in his life.  My prayer is that he puts aside the anxiety and allows God to just move.  

Next Wednesday, while Coop is winding down his first international mission trip, Molly and Craig will be boarding a plane for Honduras for 9 days.  [Poor old Emma and Gabe - stuck with mommy for 3 straight weeks...]  Once again, I get to be anxious about sending my favorite coach and sweet girl to a foreign land.  BUT, once again, what a grand opportunity God has given to my family.  Craig and Molly will get to lead vacation Bible schools, give out much needed school supplies, and best of all, be Jesus.  

It is moments like these that make me realize that my God is so much bigger than anything I could do for my family. I can't cook enough or wash enough [#truetweet] or buy enough to ever be all that they need.  Now don't get me wrong, we love each other unconditionally, but we can't ever fill that God sized hole for each other that, ultimately, is enough.  It is these moments that are presented to each of us [the Shorties, you, everyone] that give us "enough". 

Trust me.  I have tried to fill that God sized hole with other things...love, money, career, things, food...and NOTHING fills it except God.  When I stopped trying to cram all that other in there and just allowed Jesus to fill me up then it was enough.  

As my family prepares to take Jesus to the neighborhoods and the nations, I am challenged to do more.  I spoke about my "yes" a few posts ago.  I am excited about what God has challenged me to do, right here in Kings Mountain.  It has nothing to do with me but what God is doing to help some folks right here in my town.  

Jesus doesn't expect all of us to go to foreign lands. 

He simply desires our heart and He will do the rest.  That might be here and it might be a world away.  Wherever He leads us it up to us to allow Him to fill us up.  

Fill that God sized hole in your life. 

Listen when God speaks and allow Him to work in you. 

Romans 5:5 says,  "And hope does not put us to shame, 

because God's love has been poured out into our hearts 

through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us."

My sweet girl has a favorite verse that she has shared, numerous times, with me, her friends, her siblings, just anyone:

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, 

Ephesians 3:20

As I prepare for bed [only to get up at 3:45 am] this moment is enough. 

This life is enough. 

Jesus is enough.

[At the beginning of this post I put the words to "Show Me Your Glory" by Third Day. Besides the fact that this is one of my favorite songs it is also my prayer tonight. I don't want my children to settle for ordinary things that are not in the will of what God wants for their lives. I don't want to Craig and I to settle for ordinary things either. I pray that these next few weeks, and beyond, are moments that are enough as Molly, Cooper, and Craig see His Glory.]  

Everest Intervention, Married to Rocky, and Musings from the Outsiders

Gabe is obsessed with Expedition Everest.  

When I say obsessed I mean that he will not stop talking about  it, watching videos on YouTube of the ride, and searching the Disney website for information.

He rode the ride twice.  

He was TERRIFIED both times. [As in he hid his head, shut his eyes, and almost puked terrified.] 

But now that we are home and a month away from the trip to Disney he is absolutely, 100% OBSESSED with this ride.  Not only is he obsessed with the ride he is obsessed with the Yeti that is on the ride. [Even though he had his eyes closed both times and he never saw the Yeti he won't quit talking about the thing that doesn't exist.]

If you are in search of a reason to ride Expedition Everest please ask Gabe before you go.  He can tell you every turn, small hill, big hill, when the track takes you backwards, when you get to the broken part [which, FYI, hasn't always looked like it does now....through his research he learned that the track has changed since the ride has been opened], and how long the ride lasts.  

He has even researched the Himalayas [or Himilayan as he says it] and he has decided that we need to go there as a family.  Every single mountain we see gets compared to Everest: 
Is Crowder's Mountain as tall as Everest?
We walked to the top of Kings Mountain.  That's as high as Everest right?
I bet Everest looks like Grandfather Mountain.

In fact, he can tell you all about the Matterhorn Ride at Disneyland [the west coast version of Expedition Everest] and he's never, ever been to Disneyland.

The boy is driving us nuts. [And it doesn't take much to make the semi-crazy a little crazier.]  Please do us a favor and DON'T ask him anything about his favorite Disney ride. [Or if you must just be prepared for a complete doctoral dissertation on Everest, the Himilayans, and the Yeti.  You've been warned.]

I am married to a man that is a marvel. 

He makes rocks. [Sometimes I think his head is full of rocks.  Sometimes I want to throw rocks at his head.  Sometimes he wants to throw rocks at my head.  Ours is a complicated love affair.]  

Rewind 10 years ago....he had the Summer of the Stones [and I don't mean Rolling] with 9 trips to the hospital [which ain't cheap], 2 rounds of lithotripsy [which is even less cheap than the hospital], and 3 surgeries [which by all accounts is the least cheapest of the aformentioned options].  This would also be the summer after Flossie was born and when Coop broke his arm. [That new surgery pavilion at CRMC?  Yep...the Shorties made that possible.]

We learned then that Craig's body makes stones.  Lots and lots of stones. 

He recently had a kidney stone. During the this ordeal we discovered that he also has a stone in his appendix. So let me get this straight...He has this useless tube in his body that has a useless stone trapped inside of it? What the heck?  The surgeon told us that he will, at some point in his life, have appendicitis so he might as well have his appendix removed.  So having it removed is what he'll be doing at the end of July.  [Do they chisel it out? Use a rock hammer? The doctor thought it fitting after the last surgery of 2004 to hand us the stones he took out...maybe we'll get this one too...we could display them.]

Bless him...he is really disgusted.  While this isn't life threatening [can I get an amen on that one] its right at the beginning of football season.  He will be out of commission for a few weeks at a time when he really needs to be able to participate in practice.  Say a prayer for him.

Ever just feel totally left out and you can't explain why?  In some ways, be excluded is OK.  I mean if you don't want me around then that is OK...it isn't about me and I shouldn't make it a big deal.  But in other ways, when you exclude my children and they recognize it then it bothers me.  I suspect that leaving them [us] out is never done intentionally but that is what keeps me wondering....I think it might be me.  [I truly am not saying any of this for anyone to feel sorry for me.  I'm a big girl and I can handle it if I am the reason for the exclusion.]

I have prayed about this situation.  I have asked God to help me let it go. There are so many other things in this life to worry about and at 41, being left out shouldn't be one of them. I just keep hanging on to tiny threads and slivers of guilt and frustration and that makes me mad at myself.  

I will be the first to tell you that I ain't perfect, [I know some of you are upset to read those words] that I've done some stupid things, and that I am weird [nerdy, geeky, quirky, etc.].  I do try. I want to fit in and I want to feel good about my place in this situation.  I just can't seem to figure it out and it bugs me. 

It bothers me for my kids. They are good kids [the best if you ask me] and I would hate for them to feel unwanted because of something I have done or haven't done.  I just wish I understood...that is the part that really bugs me. [Not tragic and I hope I don't sound like a whiner.  I'm not trying to make a mountain out of a mole hill. I promise.]  I am truly at a crossroads with this issue.  Please pray for me about this issue.

As always, even with strange obsessions and that stone-filled man of mine, life as a Shortie couldn't be better.  Happy Fourth of July!!